The stuffy world of debating was treated to a mass striptease recently as crazed students bared all in Lower Parliament Hall, inspired by one of the nation’s leading nudist campaigners.
Seven students were moved to shed their kit in front of hundreds of shocked onlookers as Vincent Bethell, head of the little-publicised Freedom to Be Yourself Campaign, argued that forcing people to wear clothes is racist.
Bethell, 29, amazed the gathered crowd by striding into the hall wearing nothing but an impish grin and clutching a sign with the cryptic logo, “Self Aware”.
Coventry-based Vince is one of the UK’s top nude activists having been involved in high-profile kit-shedding stunts at Buckingham Palace and Scotland Yard. His antics have resulted in court cases and stints behind bars.
The debate on the motion
“This house would undress”
reached a thrilling climax as both debaters and onlookers responded to Bethell’s urgings by revealing all, astonishingly led by Union big shot Tom Plant who supported Bethell in the proposition camp.
Police had insisted on bin liners being placed on the hall’s windows to stop passers by inadvertently copping an eyeful of Vincent’s magnificent chopper.
Plant teased the expectant crowd by removing his posh get-up item by item during one of the opposition speeches. Gutted debate-goers were ultimately disappointed however when Plant kept his equipment covered up by a cleverly positioned gown.
The first of seven plucky students to go naked was KK outcast Ewan McCowen.
“He just struck me as quite genuine,” explained Ewan, “and I thought ‘What the hell, I’ve done it before.’” But honest Ewan was the first to admit that he was no match for Vincent in the trouser snake department.
“I was definitely smaller,” he confessed.
Ewan was soon joined by Plant, three daring lads and two buxom lasses in the outrageous stripathon. Frustrated viewers were allowed only a fleeting glimpse of the girls’ magnificent assets as they were quickly covered up by gowns.
Opposing the pro-nude speakers were Peter Murray and outspoken English professor Philip Parry. Murray delivered a savage attack on the exposed Bethell labelling him a
“public nuisance.”
Parry sympathised with Vince’s unclothed crusade but urged the crowd not to vote for the motion unless they were willing to shed their clothes themselves.
Not everybody was wowed by Vincent’s physique: “I wasn’t impressed,” moaned debates supremo Alan Paterson, “It was a bit of a minimalist performance.”
